A kid threw a stone at my car. I confronted his mom (who was nearby). She said, "You can't prove it was my son." How should I have reacted?
13.06.2025 01:08
The dad's response was priceless. As he looked down at his very sheepish and scared son, "Mr. Greene, I can guarantee you that my son will never touch your son again." Whatever the dad did, it worked! The boy never even LOOKED at Jonathan again.
That evening, after supper (dinner to you Yankees) he and I went to the home of the boy. The boy answered the door, saw Jonathan and me, and promptly turned ashen. I asked to speak to the boy's daddy. After introducing myself, and shaking and the man's hand, I told him the following. "According to my son, your son is picking on him, poking and punching him on the arm and chest. My son is no sissy (That's an old term meaning scared to fight.) As you can see, my boy is younger and much smaller than your son. I am sure that you, like me, can see this mismatch in size isn't fair. Plus, with all the shoving back and forth, the driver might become distracted, lose control and wreck the bus. Children, perhaps even your son or mine, could be injured or even killed. I'm asking that you talk to your son about this."
We raised our two children, Rachel and Jonathan, to come to us with any question and any issue that arose in their life. NOTHING was off the table. There was NO subject that was taboo or not to be discussed. Dad knows all the answers and can solve just about everything that comes up.
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Let's analyze this situation.
When he was about 12 or so, our very skinny and quiet son told me, "Daddy, there is a boy on the bus who picks on me. I don't do anything to deserve this. I avoid even looking at him. Plus, he's bigger than me." I had 3 answers to offer, but only one would work.
2. "Cry to the bus driver. Sit behind the driver. When the bus stops, get off and run as fast as you can from the bully!" That type of behavior is demeaning and only encourages the bully.
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3. "Son, if you know where the bully lives, Daddy will handle this."
1. Obviously, the father knew his son was capable of doing what I accused him of doing. Would I have gone to the trouble of asking the father to do something, if it were not true? Perhaps, the boy had seen his father, brother or other relatives act in such a manner.
2. I did not threaten to do anything to the boy or to his father. That's stupid and would only escalate the situation. I didn't even mention the school officials or law enforcement.
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3. The father immediately saw the seriousness and danger our sons shoving each other around posed to the safe operation of the bus. Only an idiot would encourage such behavior!
My boy will be 42 in one week, has three redheaded boys, all of whom worship their dad and their granddad, whom they call "Greene." They call their grandmother, "Ruby," which is her first name. They also know they can ask their dad, mom and grandparents any question. Just the other day, Hank, the 11 year old asked ...
1. My Depression Era, WW2 veteran, uncle Bill's answer would have been, "You stand up to him, punch him in the nose, draw blood, kick him in the leg. Beat him up!" Remember, the boy is bigger than my son. That type of behavior could lead to either boy being injured, or expelled from school. Had the fight happened on the bus, the driver might lose control and wreck the bus.